blood and rhetoric without the love
Jan. 20th, 2004 11:41 pmAnyone who knows me at all can probably guess what I thought of the State of the Union address that the Shrub gave this year, so I'll spare you most of my incensed liberal anti-Bush chatter. If I had been watching it with a group, I would definitely have played The State of the Union Drinking Game. It's probably a good thing I was alone though; not only were people spared my endless caustic asides, but my tolerance is so weak that I would've been smashed five minutes into the game.
By "endless caustic asides," I of course mean comments such as the following:
Shrub: ...the American people are using their money far better than government would have...
Me: ...because credit card debt is always a sign of financial health.
Shrub: ...we must ensure that older students and adults can gain the skills they need to find work now.
Me: I already have the skills. The problem lies in finding the work.
Shrub: ...we should limit the burden of government on this economy by acting as good stewards of taxpayers' dollars.
Me: Great idea! No time like the present.
Shrub: ...I also ask you to reform our immigration laws so they reflect our values...
Me: So, only conservative heterosexual Christians will be allowed across the border.
And finally, my favorite part of the State of the Union address...
Shrub: Key provisions of the Patriot Act are set to expire next year.
Congress: *clap clap clap*
By "endless caustic asides," I of course mean comments such as the following:
Shrub: ...the American people are using their money far better than government would have...
Me: ...because credit card debt is always a sign of financial health.
Shrub: ...we must ensure that older students and adults can gain the skills they need to find work now.
Me: I already have the skills. The problem lies in finding the work.
Shrub: ...we should limit the burden of government on this economy by acting as good stewards of taxpayers' dollars.
Me: Great idea! No time like the present.
Shrub: ...I also ask you to reform our immigration laws so they reflect our values...
Me: So, only conservative heterosexual Christians will be allowed across the border.
And finally, my favorite part of the State of the Union address...
Shrub: Key provisions of the Patriot Act are set to expire next year.
Congress: *clap clap clap*